Pandora's Box Must Have Been Filled with Chocolate

You know it's bad when you sing, say prayers, hug and kiss, then RUN out of the kid's bedroom to steal your 3 year old's "potty treats" in a vain attempt to satiate your sugar craving.

The day started well:
Today is our busy day.  I took Cherith in and out of her car seat 12 times, that number would be higher if her big sisters couldn't walk to soccer practice or if I didn't leave her in the car while dropping some others off at science co-op.
Busy can often lead to stress which some how activates the hand-to-mouth mechanism.
But I was prepared.

We had lunch on-the-go:
I had a plan.  I was doing pretty well.
I had a coffee with sucanat before the departure... or wait, did I??
Leaving was so hectic, it's all a blurr now. Either way, I meant to.  I have allowed myself one sweetened, frothy, hot bev a day.
My lunch was cucumbers, tomato and avocado with balsamic vinegar and some seasoning.  There were pumpkin seeds and a carrot too. AND, as insurance, when I juiced this morning I set aside enough to take along for the ride (dandelion greens, cucumbers, beets, oranges and lemon were my ace in the pocket).

I was super proud of myself:
until 3:00pm hit.

I'm not sure what I should have done better.  3:00pm rolls around and nothing felt more pressing than the need to get home and lay in bed.  But that was not a realistic hope.  So immediately the fantasy morphed into: GET SUGAR AND FAST.

Crash: Getting up the stairs to put Nissi to nap sent my head spinning into a headache that lasted for a couple hours.  As soon as the coast was clear I made (another?) coffee with frothed milk and sucanat and devoured a generous slice of the sourdough bread I made yesterday with and even more generous dallop of honey.

This may not seem so bad.  But for me there is not a reliable brakes system in place.

Have you ever gone to an ice cream shop with the fam and made the mistake of letting the baby taste your ice cream?
As soon as the kid gets tipped off to what the creamy stuff in your bowl tastes like...
 that's all your are doing the rest of the time there.
Oh and don't run out of ice cream before it's time to go.
Oh no.
If every moment is not completed with the deliciousness in their mouth anyone in ear shot will bear the consequence of you're "sharing the wealth".

Pandora's box must have been filled with chocolate.  I just realized that... I'm changing my post title

And Burn: I'll skip over some of the details of the next several hours, but now I find myself hiding taffy (potty treat) wrappers in the back side of the trash can so my kids don't bust me in the morning.

I am addicted to sugar.  I have known and fought this for years.

I don't want this for me or for my family.  My philosophy of food and life cannot coexist with this addiction.

So here's my idea. I'm going to quit sugar for 8 weeks.  That's supposed to be the time it takes to fully detox and break the addiction.

Some of my action plans are:
-Blog through the process. This will hold me accountable somewhat and give a sense of purpose.
-Prepare for success with healthy combatant foods like probiotic sauerkraut and hard boiled eggs.
-Trade my joys of sugar for the joys I was intended for (i.e. the reason to look forward to a party ought not to be the cake).
-give freedom to myself as a gift.  I plan to start May 22nd.  My birthday is exactly 8 weeks later.
-... well that's all I've got for now.